Recently, during my time as a single lady, I have taken extra note of observing the relationships surrounding me. I definitely have a few friends whose boyfriends or girlfriends I love and can’t wait to pop champagne with at their wedding. Others receive dirty looks or the occasional bashing in the group text. But some are just plain wacky.
Today, I’ll explain one of the aforementioned crazy couples. I hope you get as much enjoyment as I do watching these shitshows unfold. I am not particularly close to this couple, but I see them fair enough and our circles interact frequently. I happen to spend a lot of time near the girlfriend, and, kid you not, have ran into her crying in the bathroom or screaming at him on the phone- or both- several times this year.
This pair, let’s call them Rachel and Roy, who are a year apart. Normally, this isn’t weird, but Rachel is the older one, which immediately sets off some cougar vibes. Roy is a sweet kid with some strange tendencies (i.e. is an avid herbal fan even though we are way, way too old for that. Really.) and is completely oblivious to Rachel’s constant debauchery. Rachel, on the other hand, is a bitch. She, like many of us, including myself, do, suffers from chronic resting bitch face and a crazy streak. She’s a serial cheater and posts Instagrams in such skimpy clothes that she might as well not wear any.
From someone who does not like saying ‘whipped’, since I believe strongly in women being equals in relationships, Roy is whipped. Actually, that’s probably an understatement. She has cheated on him an endless amount of times and he texts other girls a lot. But, her cheating has been proven twice, even though that’s only a small fraction of the incidents, and he simply refuses to believe it. Despite all this, they still.are.together. after two- yes, twenty-four whole months!! two Christmases!- years of this. After these blowouts, they spend hours screaming at each other, deleting contacts off each others’ phones, and receiving threats of the police being called. True story.
Frankly, I don’t get it. At all. I don’t understand the disloyalty on both sides, though hers is worse, the constant fighting, and just why they keep coming back to each other. Both parties are good looking; she has a great body and has actually modeled before, and he’s cute too. Surely, they both can do better. When they are together, they’re not even that much of a power couple, either. Besides laying on the PDA, I have never, ever heard anyone say how much they “love Rachel and Roy” or “want them to be together”. Hmmm.
How Rachel reacts when anyone sees her crying or screaming at him, even though she does such things in public places: (like, I’m just trying to pee. Relax.)
Maybe opposites don’t attract… this couple is simply crazy on crazy. Thoughts?